REMINISCENCES. My Brown Italian Crucifix.

To You My Love,

The Invaluable Brown Italian Crucifix

My eyes go dry from seeing you again. The days seem to lengthen, and my sleepless nights are endless. It has been practically three months outside my unforgettable green Guatemala, it has seemed thoroughly difficult for me to conceive a sunrise without seeing you upon waking up, and to feel the innate celestial thoughtful gratitude to God for a new day. Being reminded by you, flood me with beautiful feelings, how much I wish that the days fly by, and the world health situation normalize so that, excitedly, I can once again gaze your prettiness, and experience the tenderness of your eyes!

Indeed, for 9 years, my beautiful and pious crucifix has always been accompanying me. How can I forget the first time that my humble and trembling hands caressed you, and laid you on my excited throbbing chest! You are the gift of God that brought peace to my heart in the most turbulent moments of my fourth decade. With you, I cry. With you, I laugh. With you, I rejoice for life. You are my comfort. You are my strength. You understand me. Thinking of you in these days, refers me to the Lord, the Son of God, hanging on the cross whose generous surrender reveals God's infinite love for humanity. Although molded by human hands, I will never finish appreciating your inexhaustible transcendental gist. Wow! How my heart is pounding at the thought of our first meeting. Beginning the solemn and decided fourteenth CICM General Chapter in that month of June 2011, you were my first best gift. Arriving in a distant European country, having flown thousands of kilometers, lost in the cloudy skies, crossed the deep and disturbing ocean waters, struck by the winds of the four horizons and landed in Rome, the Eternal City, of peaceful and quiet night streets, you were my cloth of tears in the nostalgic days of the Roman summer.

Today, quarantined without you in the insular hurricane Asian country, I want you to know that I miss you a lot. However, the distance shouts at me and makes me remember, in the serene silence of each

awakening, your morning caresses. But above all, the distance reminds me "away from the eyes, close to the heart." Oh, my brown crucifix, of unique and irreplaceable value, I love you like “the apple of my eye.” Small, oval, trefoil, silver crucifix mounted on brown Italian wood, held by an imperceptible screw, you are the most precious present in my roomy chamber, ornamented with double multi-square windows and framed with some semi-circular details. Hanging on the wall near the TV, juxtaposed with the image of the Virgin Mary of Guadalupe, made of Mexican hands, you are a witness to my sleepless nights. Away from the eyes, but close to the heart, my precious crucifix, how much I long for you. I hope like May rain that the coronavirus will pass to take the first flight that will take me to enjoy in your lap and be with you in the homely sanctuary of my calm and freshly sanded and lined room San Juan (hardwood impenetrable by termites).

To receive your morning blessing again on the winter chipi-chipi days (mus-mus hab’= fine rain) or on the sunny summer days and enjoying Cobán's kaq’ k’iq (one of the typical dishes of Cobán) with their respective hot chocolate will make me very happy. And when I kick the bucket, may they put you in my bucket and allow you to accompany me in my eternal rest and to remain both united forever. Those who love each other - as told by some people- will find themselves even beyond death. My loving brown Italian crucifix, I am so lucky to have you in my journey, I will never forget how tender you have made me feel. That's why I love you.

Fr. Maxi Charitable Derisseau, cicm